Docked her

Andrew was a dental practitioner. Whilst it said “Dentist” on his office door, the word “Performer” was emblazoned across his heart.

Every last Thursday of the month he’d down tools, grab his suitcase and rush to the moored ferry. A long weekend, the sea, stage lights and rapturous applause would await him.

Whilst he loved to sing to a captive audience with all the glitz and glamour, sparkles and general razzle-dazzle of his routine, he’d still have preferred a stage on dry land. He always found it tricky to shave his legs and apply makeup when the waters were choppy.

 


 

This piece was submitted as part of Friday Fictioneers, hosted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. 1 photograph. 100 words. Over 120 people taking part.

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77 thoughts on “Docked her

  1. Brilliant! Enjoyed this very much. I felt for him and really, you created quite a character there..

  2. Dear Peter,

    I’ve learned to put my coffee down while reading your stories. I definitely would’ve spewed at your last line.

    Should it be “he’d PUT down his tools?” without put it sounds like he swallowed them.

    Aside from that…highly entertaining.

    shalom,

    Rochelle

  3. Sandra says:

    Clever title; clever characterisation.

    • MrBinks says:

      Thanks. I felt good about it this week – this one felt more in keeping with the other stories from my book, People Watching 🙂

  4. Ese' s Voice says:

    Perfect! 😀 Still laughing…

  5. Shame on you, stealing my character. They’re MY legs! 😉

  6. Horus says:

    Docked me too ! 😀

    – what a characterization !

  7. Once again really funny Mr Binks! I just got the ‘doctor’ bit too. Brilliant. ‘Downing tools’ works here in Australia 🙂

  8. For those interested, my FF piece was written as #replyfiction to this one. Here’s the link:

    http://jessieansons.com/2014/06/11/the-black-sheep-of-the-family-friday-fictioneers/

  9. Andrew is living to the fullest, good for him. Maybe he shouldn’t leave shaving his legs for the last minute, there are so many better methods. Good story.

  10. Mr. Binks, Hilarious. I also laughed out loud. 😀 Does Andrew ever fill teeth during his act? I’d like to see that. In fact, teeth or no teeth, I’d like to see that act. Well done. 🙂 ___Susan

    • MrBinks says:

      Thanks for the kind comment. It is my pleasure to make you laugh – though I’m thinking now of, perhaps, a minutely rate.

  11. I would suggest a wax! Lasts longer… Love the use of “whilst”…We don’t hear that in the states much.

  12. Hannah says:

    Amusing as always—I love that you spool out details and still manage to surprise in your final sentence.

  13. Ah.. maybe he should start to shave his legs at the practice.. his customer might appreciate his new looks.

  14. hugmamma says:

    A singing dentist. Something I could get use to…

  15. I agree with Rochelle only I was eating a sandwich that almost landed on the key pad. Wonderful twist at the end. Kudos.

  16. helenmidgley says:

    Another laugh out loud one, brill 🙂

  17. What a contrast – I will try and call up these images next time I am at the dentist 🙂

  18. high five and raspberries says:

    The title is brilliant, the filling superbe, the ending delightful. I will try to wipe the mouthfull of tea that I spewed across my screen…:)

  19. jamsun says:

    This is very interesting! The only thing that I stumbled on is “downed tools,” but then I read the comments and realized it’s an UK phrase, so then it was fine for me. I really like the juxtaposition of the dentistry and performer, and the title is hilarious!

    • MrBinks says:

      It sounds like you enjoyed it. Thank you for reading, and even more for taking the time to comment. I do hope you’ll come back soon.

  20. Oh that was good. Wish I’d thought of it! lol

  21. Funny story, but I hope that’s not what my dentist does, trilling when he’s not drilling.

  22. tedstrutz says:

    Clever. Jessie sent me.

  23. Rajlakshmi says:

    the ending is brilliant, Loved the story

  24. That’s very funny. Not too many scars, I hope.
    (A lot of us may well have Performer emblazed on our hearts.)

  25. Nan Falkner says:

    Dear Mr. Binks, I love your story and your country has the neatest mysteries and dramas via PBS for us to watch. I too, was confused about the “downed tools” comment. Your title is so clever! Good job! Nan 🙂

    • MrBinks says:

      Hi Nan,
      Thanks for the kind comment. I can’t take credit for the British dramas, but the title was all me 😉

  26. I did not see that coming. Funny and well done!

  27. subroto says:

    Ha ha! Brilliant! Maybe a Brazilian friend could have helped during these waxing times.

  28. Razzle-dazzle really did it for me! This was an absolute delight to read! 🙂

  29. elappleby says:

    A clever title and a funny finish. Excellent take on the prompt, Mr Binks 🙂

  30. ContactRida says:

    more like he “tucked his tool”:) haha. great take, very creative!

  31. draliman says:

    I bet he really looks forward to his monthly drag act. Very funny!

  32. Love the fact that you made the boat the focus of the story, rather than the dentist’s tools. Beautiful take! And that title! Oh, that title 🙂

  33. Lucy says:

    The last line made me laugh. I bet it’s difficult to shave those legs and apply makeup when the water’s choppy. Great take on the prompt. Well done. Lucy

  34. There is more action on the boat than in the clinic.This made me smile and then laugh. Shaving on choppy water is tricky , then why now shift to waxing.

  35. Liz Young says:

    Good for Andrew – I know one or two Trannie performers and they’re great!

  36. […] week following Mr Binks’ reply, he posted this 100 word piece about an ordinary dentist with a ‘razzle-dazzle’ secret on the weekends. So I did a […]

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