Walter Wants Water

Walter smiled. His previously clenched eyelids had loosened but not opened, and his eyes twitched beneath them. The cascading waterfall he was currently bathing in was half a world away from the dusty, red sand where he lay. The dust and dirt of which covered him, clogged every pore and yet proved to be a very ineffective sunscreen.

He dived beneath the water, soaking himself in the welcome lagoon.

The desert stretched beyond the horizon. Footprints had long since swept away. Walter’s foot flinched and kicked out involuntarily. His skin blistered and the vultures looked on, ravenous.

Walter smiled.

 


Posted as part of a Flash Fiction prompt from Carrot Ranch Communications.

July 9, 2014 prompt: In 99 words (no more, no less) write story about water.  What significance does water have to the story, the setting or character (s)? How is water evocative or manipulated? What river flows through your imagination? Respond by noon (PST) Tuesday, July 15 to be included in the compilation.

 

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21 thoughts on “Walter Wants Water

  1. Excellent flash, MrBinks! You’ve created a great scene that shows both the inner and outer story with both luscious and parched details. And, all in 99 words! It’s good to meet you and I hope to see more flash from you! Thanks for joining the Carrot Ranch Flash Fiction Challenge!

    1. Thanks Charli.
      I’ve been writing flash fiction for a year or so now, and have been really enjoying it. Feeling I may even have found my niche, perhaps. I hope you’ll take a nose through my blog and find other stories you may like. I’ll certainly do the same at yours.

      Thanks for the welcome, glad you liked my quick attempt.

      1. Enjoyed your quick attempt…it is a “quick draw” every week with the idea that the short deadline and word constraint act to stimulate creativity. I will most certainly poke around and read your other stories!

  2. Oh we need to know more! Great flash – I shouldn’t have peeked (always curious about new people) – now I’m under pressure to come up with anything half as good!

  3. I was confused at first about how he can bathe in water but also lay I the desert but then of course! He’s dreaming of water. Poor Walter… his name is so close yet so far away.

    1. I wasn’t sure if I was being too subtle with it or not. I think I trod a fine line, but if you got there eventually I guess I was just on the right side of the line.

      I used line a lot there.

      Line.

      #Line.

    1. Don’t be so quick to judge “poor” Walter. One should probably question what he was doing there in the first place…

      Thank you for reading, and for sharing a comment.

      1. Ha! True. I was going to “poor Walter”, too. But you are so right.

        Fantastic flash. Regardless of what Walter was doing there, how he ended up in that situation, or what type of person he is (was), I’m still saying you made this reader feel for him. Although… Now that I’m typing all this, are you going to answer any of these questions in another story? Or a longer version of this one? Inquiring minds want to know. 😉

  4. I can imagine the need to put mind over matter in such a situation. I have never been that parched but have used similar visualization in less dramatic circumstances. A great picture!

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