Me. You. Coffee.

“I say.” said the man.

“I say!” said the other man.

“No you didn’t.” exclaimed the man.

“I bloody did.” replied the other man.

“I sayed first.” said the man.

“Well I said.” objected the other man, “And besides, ‘sayed’ isn’t even a word.”

The man took a deep breath. The other man did the same.

“Look,” said the man, “I’m going to go get a coffee and I’d really rather you just, you know, did your own thing from now on.”

The other man thought for a moment.

“Black?” he asked.

“What?” puzzled the man.

“Black coffee?” asked the other man.

“As a matter of fact, yes.” the man said, rather abruptly.

“hmmm,” mused the other man, “I used to have milk in my coffee. I don’t any more.”

“Since when?” asked the man, before realising he really didn’t care for the answer.

“Just then.” answered the other man.

The man rolled his eyes and sighed. It was going to be a long afterlife.