Me. You. Coffee.

A 100 word story by

MrBinks

·

Soap and water

“Let the plug out, Michael,” mum would say.

My brother would groan. He enjoyed the splashing; drenching mum as she knelt by the side of the tub, flannel in hand and a tired look upon her brow.

“Michael, I won’t ask you again,” she would say next. It would always be me. I was the older of the two so I constantly got the tap end. It wasn’t so bad though – mum couldn’t reach with me with the soap.

The third and final call would be the same every time. “Michael,” she’d snap, “don’t make me call your father.”

This piece was written for Friday Fictioneers. A group of writers aiming to fulfil the promise of writing 100 words against a weekly prompt. You can find the prompt over at Rochelle’s blog. Go on, take a look.

c-hase

Tags:

Responses to “Soap and water”

  1. Darshana Kalyanpur

    Such a beautiful take on the prompt. Nicely done.

    Reply
    1. MrBinks

      Very kind; thanks for reading.

      Reply
  2. Claire Fuller

    A lovely little snippet of memory. No one ever wants the tap end – all baths should have the taps in the middle. (A very minor point – the word ‘always’ jumped out at me – I think you’ve got quite a lot of them in there.)

    Reply
    1. MrBinks

      Good grief, you’re right! ick! /silently rewrites.

      Reply
    2. MrBinks

      Edited. Thanks for point that out!

      Reply
      1. Claire Fuller

        Nice. But don’t worry, it’s so easily done.

  3. rochellewisoff

    Dear Peter,

    I remember being the mother in this story when I gave my two sons a bath. Well done story. I could picture it and even smell the soap.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Reply
  4. Danny James

    I remember scenes like that. Thanks for the memories.

    DJ

    Reply
  5. ansumani

    The tired mother…disobedient children…threat to call the father….I see a woman whose life was not under her control…Not sure if you want to convey that message but thats what I see very clearly.

    Reply
  6. Sandra

    Now I was the youngest yet I still always had the tap end… Great take on the prompt. Off the wall… 🙂

    Reply
  7. phylor

    Perfect! And yes, I heard a lot of “wait til your father gets home!!!!” Or my mother would call me by my full name — look out.
    Love your take on the prompt!

    Reply
  8. aliciajamtaas

    Wonderful memories float up with story. Me and my two sisters in one tub – me in the middle. Always wonder how on earth we came out clean. Well done.

    Reply
  9. Lorna’s Voice

    Ah, great story. Brought back my own bubble bath memories! 😉

    Reply
  10. lingeringvisions by Dawn

    Yes, this made me think of my oldest two when they were younger. They are in their 30’s now!

    Reply
  11. gahlearner

    I had to laugh at the escape from the soap, but that threat with the father… brings back not so great memories. I wonder if younger mothers still do this? I hope not…Great take on the prompt.

    Reply
  12. The Writer’s Village

    Cute recalling of a typical family style experience.
    Now pull the plug. Ok?
    Randy

    Reply
  13. Jan Brown

    “Don’t make me call your father!” A universal refrain heard somewhere round the world at any given time of the day/night.

    Nice story, a little slice of life.

    Reply
  14. Margaret

    A touching picture of a familiar domestic moment, but the mother’s fatigue lingers in the mind as a discordant note. The narrator is oblivious to the significance of it, but it comes through your story. Nice touch.

    Reply
  15. Dawn Quyle Landau

    Mr. Binks, this is one of my favorites of yours. I can remember these tub times so well, and you’ve really captured it so beautifully here– wonderful story telling!

    Reply
  16. amiewrites74

    Reminds me of my house back when my two were young enough to share a bath. My older always got the tap end too. Loved it.

    Reply

Leave a reply to Claire Fuller Cancel reply