Terry, Jeff, Colin and Bob

Terry, Jeff, Colin and Bob went to sea in a rancid boat. They took some jerky and plenty of Bud, all wrapped in a t-shirt (covered in mud.) Colin looked over to Bob on his left, as they nodded then bellowed an ode to Terry ‘n’ Jeff. “O’ Terry and Jeff, Teff and Jerry, what wonderful friends you […]

Maria and the crack

Maria twitched. She wasn’t sure how long she’d been staring at the crack but it must have been a while. The coffee in her cup, previously too hot, was now perfectly drinkable. She blinked rapidly and took a sip, her eyes fixated. It wasn’t pretty. It certainly wasn’t that interesting but here Maria stood. She […]

When Harry Went Silly

When Harry said he was going to build a fence to keep the fog out, people thought he was mad. In the winter of 1993 they were proved right. Harry was certified insane. His friends left. His family forgot him. No fog has been seen since. Today, in a field in Leicester, a piece of […]

The penguin looked at me

A fish past three A cabbage in a tree. The milkman walked right by and the penguin looked at me. A quarter past door Two rainclouds on the floor. The postman’s on a camel and the carrot’s looking sore. A Ten to squirrel Nothing rhymes with squirrel. A bulb filmed an orange on […]

Cheese

It’s good to see that the surreal is alive and well in the child that sits in the back seat of my car. When told from the front to the back that in fact this child of mine smelled of cheese, he slapped his thigh and laughed with a sigh and declared that in fact […]